When friends I knew, new friends, people that I had begun to love and cherish would hear me speak about Kavi, they’d usually quite quickly realize this is someone whom they’d learn a great much about before ever meeting him. “You don’t have to preface the story with “my friend, Kavi…. we know who he is. We practically know him from all the things you’ve told us” they’d proclaim. It’s true. I’d gush about him. I’d gush and I’d gush. But those moments when I got to watch people meet Kavi for the first time were some of the most delightful. Because no matter how much I hyped the man, he always blew people away. The way Kavi made others feel when around him is a feat unto itself. I recall dearly Kavi and Kevin Niemela meeting for the first time and upon seeing their friendship blossom I was filled with such adoration. Kavi spread love and joy so readily.

My girlfriends through the years have been seriously worried and insecure because of the level of love I spoke about Kavi Pandey. They were afraid, they said, that I would never love them like I loved him. I was without words of comfort in these moments, moments that often led to divisions and eventual breakups. The truth is they have always been right. He is a love supreme.

Well, I’m crying now. Love you all.


Captain Spaghetti was turning 21 and I wanted to be the one to buy her her first shot, but Kavi also wanted to be the one to get her first shot. Being reasonable adults, we raced to the bar and tried to get our shot orders in first, and we both raced back to Captain Spaghetti but a stranger had purchased her first legal shot and beaten us both. Kavi and I had bought each other a shot along with our friend’s in order to either rub victory in, or to feed the other’s sorrow.